Sometimes life gives you lemons, sometimes instead of making lemonade you surf craigslist searching for the only one-legged prostitute with a dead tooth that you would sleep with. Thus far I have been unsuccessful...
Occasionally, I will make eye contact with an attractive woman. Instead of saying hello I'll contemplate what kind of crazy she might bring into my world. The last one was allergic to cotton and hated fresh food. I'm glad I didn't say anything.
When darkness descends, you probably want to light a candle or something. From what I hear that darkness is a real bitch.
When you realize that achieving a goal is more difficult than you wanted it to be, just give up and tell everyone you gave it your best (or 110%). There's nothing like pity to get over the shame of your own laziness.
I don't understand why people ever looked down on hippies. They do a lot of drugs and have a lot of orgies. Sounds like it would be heaven to a few people I know (me)...
Whatever happened to romantic poetry and the people who wrote them? Is "DJ's got us falling in love again" really our modern lyrical love poems?
I really think we should get rid of time zones. Just make it the same time every where in the world. So when you call someone that is far away you don't have to feel obligated to ask, "what time is it over there?"
Do fire-breathers in the circus get lung cancer? I imagine it might be worse than smoking cigarettes.
Today I said something to someone who was wearing headphones. I hate that awkward moment when I have to repeat myself in front of bystanders when the person removes the headphones. Why do I always assume they're not listening to anything when people have those on?
Anyway, I decided to just sit down for a few minutes and just write random stuff. I'll try to think of a more thought provoking post for next time.
